Antes e depois do casamento.

Before and after marriage 

Before - You take my breath away. 
After - I feel like I'm suffocating. 

Before - Twice a night. 
After - Twice a month. 

Before - She loves the way I take control of a Situation. 
After - She called me a controlling, manipulative, egomaniac. 

Before - Saturday Night Live. 
After - Monday Night Football. 

Before - He makes me feel like a million dollars. 
After - If I had a dime for every stupid thing he's done... 

Before - Don't Stop. 
After - Don't Start. 

Before - The Sound of Music. 
After - The Sound of Silence. 

Before - Is that all you are eating? 
After - Maybe you should just have a salad, honey. 

Before - It's like living a dream. 
After - It's a nightmare. 

Before - Turbocharged. 
After - Needs a jump-start. 

Before - We agree on everything! 
After - Doesn't she have a mind of her own? 

Before - He's lost without me. 
After - Why can't he ask for directions? 

Before - Oysters. 
After - Fish sticks. 

Before - I can hardly believe we found each other. 
After - How the hell did I end up with someone like you?